Are You Stuck in the Habit? What Stops You From Letting Go of the Habit?

What's Stopping You?

Bad habits die hard and when you’re stuck in one, it’s often easier to just give up fighting altogether and just simply let the habits overcome your efforts.  Forget about the concept of failure.  As long as you’re in your comfort zone, you believe you are fine.  The only problem with this thinking is, you are so wrong.  You know you have a bad habit and you so desperately want to change it, but you can’t seem to get past square one.  No matter what you do, you keep slipping and sliding back.  So what’s stopping you from making the change in your life and seeking improvement?

Is that a stop sign I see?

You have the desire to change a bad habit, shouldn’t that be enough?  If only it were that easy.  Often, having a strong desire to end a bad habit isn’t enough.  Why?  For one, habits, whether they are good or bad, have a tendency to stick around.  They last forever and even when you conquer them, they can remain dormant for many years.  If you’re not careful, they could creep up on you during a weak moment and then overcome you again.

Second, old habits offer something comforting because of their familiarity.  Most of us are afraid to move forward for fear of living a life we know that is safe and exchanging it for a life that is unknown yet exciting.  When this happens, we miss out on  great opportunities.

I want my bad habit to end now!

So, how can you overcome a bad habit that has a stranglehold on you?  Is there something stopping you?  If there is, do you know what it is?  Here’s how you can stop your bad habits and begin changing your life:

Find out the root cause of your bad habit

Regardless of what habit you might have, it has a purpose for existing.  Something in your past supported you in acquiring and developing this habit.  Ask yourself these questions – was there a painful or embarrassing situation you experienced in the past or did you experience encouragement in order to develop a habit?  Did acquiring that habit make you feel good about yourself?  Accepted?  Loved?  Admired?  Or does it make you feel guilty, shameful or embarrassed?

Understanding and owning  what supported your bad habit will help you understand what’s stopping you from achieving your goals.  Oftentimes, by targeting a specific cause or reason, you will understand what your real motivation is for nurturing the habit and how you can finally put an end to it.

Acknowledge your responsibility

Stop blaming your parents or your elder siblings or your friends for your bad habit.  This can stop you from moving on.  You not only feel more bitter about your present situation, you could also end up hurting people’s feelings.  As a child, you probably are free of blame for doing things that you didn’t volunteer.

As an adult, however, it’s a totally different story.  You are an adult who is responsible for everything you do and say.  You are probably under no duress to go on with your habit.  Once you’ve acknowledged your own contribution, you can then move on.

Accept your fears

Fears are beneficial by nature because they are the result of our instincts and reflexes that help protect us in times of danger.  However, fears have a nasty tendency of getting blown out of proportion.  A fear can overwhelm and paralyze you even if it’s just a tiny thing.

Is it fear that is stopping you?  If it is, learn to accept it as your own.  Denying you don’t have it or that it doesn’t exist will only aggravate your emotions.  It is there and you know it.  You can’t make it go away if you don’t tell yourself it’s even there in the first place.  After you have accepted it, learn to let it go.  Because you know it to be your own, you have every right to throw your fears away.

Make a decision to replace a bad habit with a positive one

You can’t kill a bad habit but you can stop doing it.  Better yet, you can acquire a new one that will replace the bad habit and contribute to making a positive change in your life.  Ask yourself, ‘What do I want changed in my life?  How badly do I want it?  What am I willing to do to get it?  What can I look forward to if I make that change?’  The answers to these questions should be reasons enough to take action.

When you have made that decision, you should be able to feel a strong compulsion to take steps in the right direction.  You alone can make that move, no one else.  Now that you have the incentive to change your bad habits and create good ones, there should be no stopping you this time.

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